“I couldn’t tell what he was feeling, because I couldn’t speak the language of his feelings.”
I cannot read a man’s mind, usually. I get glimpses but what I don’t understand is I am expected to get it. Someone said to me recently, “It is apparent that you don’t quite understand my need for this time slot in my life.”
Ya think? I don’t get it at all because you never TALKED to me about it. You left me to speculate and wonder what I might have done. Everything was great, moving smoothly and fun fun fun. I walked in the house from getting my nails done and you’re packing up telling me “I have some bad news”. The bad news what all of the plans we had made had to wait as he was leaving to visit his family. I didn’t get it.
All I want is a conversation, a talk, an explanation. That’s it. If you sit with me and say, “baby, I have to leave because I need time by myself to wander and ponder and think.” This I can get my head around. “It isn’t you, but it is something I need to do for myself.” I get that. So why can’t men do this? How am I supposed to read the mind and the heart?
I heard once that men have two emotions: horny and hungry. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. Is this really true? Is it really that simple? No, because the men I know have depth and emotions and feelings….they just cannot express them.
Why is it? I know this has been asked for centuries. And I know by now just to let them do their thing….but honestly, don’t expect me to get what you cannot express. If it were that easy.
Say this to me: “Honey, you have done so much for me, and I really care about you, but I need to be alone to resolve grief issues and see friends and find myself.” This I can work with.
What I did get was confusion and a note. A note that said wonderful, loving things….but left me confused even more when he became distant.
Your things are at my house. My heart is with you, I am at my house.